To Be Loved: Chapter Four

Hey all, I know I said I'd post daily from now on, so I apologize for yesterday. (Things got a little hectic.) So to make up for it, I'm posting double! Enjoy! =D

Skye’s P.O.V.

I was happy to wake up to the same scent as yesterday, minty and musky. I smiled as I laid my head on Adam’s hard chest.
“I love the sound of your heartbeat,” I told him quietly.
I could hear it very clearly. It was strong.
Boom, boom. Boom, boom.
“Why?” he asked, chuckling.
“Because when I listen to it, I know you‘ll live a long life, so it makes me happy to know that I‘ll have you with me forever.”
He smiled and held me closer to him.
“Promise me something, Adam?”
“What is it?”
I hesitated. “Promise me that you’ll always remember that I love you. Always. Even if you someday lose your memory. Keep it in the back of your head. Remember it like you remember how to breathe.”
His face was blank for a moment, and then he closed his eyes. He opened them again and looked at me. He grabbed my hand resting on his chest and pulled it closer to his heart.
“I promise.”
I sighed softly and laid my head back on his chest as Adam ran his fingers through my hair. He kissed my forehead.
This is how I always wanted it to be for us, the next long days of our lives together. I wanted to be with him like this, always right there, listening to his heart thump as it tells me he will be with me for the rest of my life.
I felt like I was forgetting something, and I remembered. I looked at the time on the digital clock next to us. Eight thirty-seven A.M.
“Aaron’s supposed to pick me up,” I mumbled to Adam. “He should have been here by now. Did he call?”
“Don’t think so. I left my cell phone on. Didn‘t have time to turn it off.” He smirked.
“He would have called if he couldn’t come…”
Something wasn’t right. It wasn’t like Aaron. I know he kept his word, and he would have called if he couldn’t.
I got on my feet and stretched. I picked up my phone from the desk and dialed Aaron’s number. I stood outside our door and then saw Aaron’s phone shaking, vibrating on the little table. My heart ached as I considered the possibility that was forming in my head.
“Oh, God,” I groaned.
“What’s wrong?” Aaron asked, instantly by my side, caressingly kissing my shoulder.
“Aaron. He left his phone here. He must have come back for it and heard us. He heard us, Adam!” I hid my face in my hands, horrified.
“So? He still would have called. He‘s not the kind of guy to get all uncomfortable and freaked out about that.”
“You don’t understand, Adam! Aaron-” I covered my mouth quickly.
“Aaron what?” He said suspiciously, his eyebrows furrowing.
I closed my eyes. Should I tell him? I wondered. I didn’t want to hurt him, but he should know. I didn’t want to keep this from him forever.
“Elena, Aaron what?” He asked again. He rarely ever called me Elena, except when he was serious or worried.
I took a deep breath, and looked down at the floor. “Aaron, he…a few nights ago…he told me he had feelings for me.” I raised my head, though I kept my eyes on his mouth. I didn‘t have the courage to look into his eyes.
“He kissed me,” I whispered.
Slowly, I looked up. His expression was blank.
“And I thought for a while that I had feelings for him,” I said slowly.
Still blank.
“But I don’t,” I continued quickly, defensively. “I love you and only you. I know that now.”
The doorbell rang. I kept my eyes on Adam a few seconds longer, then walked downstairs.
Even more proof. He would have just let himself in using the spare key. He always did.
I opened the door and there stood Aaron. He had circles under his red eyes.
“Aaron…”
“Sorry I’m late,” he mumbled, looking at the floor as he stepped inside.
“Aaron,“ I said again. “I-”
Adam was suddenly right there, grabbing Aaron from the collar of his shirt, shaking him a little. He was fast.
“Damn, you, Aaron! How dare you put even one finger on her! Trying to steal my girl, huh?” I saw him pull back his arm, and I quickly pushed Adam away from Aaron.
“Please, Adam, stop! Please,” I sobbed. I had my eyes shut tight. I felt his body relax and he slowly wrapped one arm around my waist, and rested the other on the small of my back. I could feel him staring at Aaron over my shoulder.
“Don’t you dare come to the wedding.”
My eyes opened wide in horror. I looked at Aaron, and he just stood there, looking at the floor. He probably hated me now, and I couldn’t blame him. I’ve hurt him too much already.
I dug my face back into Adam’s chest, and I heard the door close.

I was anxious all the next day. When I woke up, Adam was gone. He left a note that said he went over to Noah’s to rehearse, and I knew he was staying longer than he needed to.
I tried to keep myself busy by cleaning, but there wasn’t much to clean, so I finished quickly. I went upstairs to the room, took out a book, and waited.
I heard a car pull up around six, then I heard the front door open and close. It was silent for a few seconds, but then I heard him begin to walk up the stairs, and I stood.
He entered, carrying his guitar case, and closed the door behind him.
“Hi,” I said quietly, forcing a smile, though only one corner of my mouth curved.
“Hey.”
We stood there quietly for a moment. The silence was almost deafening.
Then he dropped his case and pulled me close to him. I shut my eyes closed to prevent from crying. Didn‘t work.
“I’m sorry,” I sobbed into his shirt. “Please understand. Please forgive me.”
He held me tighter and rest his chin on my head as he smoothed my hair. “I understand. I forgive you.”
I clenched to him more. There was no distance between us, I was as close as possible, and yet it was never enough for me when I held Adam.
We stayed like that for a long time, in complete silence, just holding each other.
“Adam?”
“Yeah?”
I opened my mouth to speak, but no sound came out. I closed it, then opened it again. “Please let Aaron come to the wedding. I’d feel bad if he wasn’t there.”
“No,” he answered, gentle but firm.
“Please. I’m just as guilty.”
He looked down at me. I hated myself for causing the pain I could see in his eyes.
“I can’t, Skye.”
“But he’s your brother!”
He sighed, and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I’m sorry, but the answer is still no.”
My lips trembled, and I could feel tears in my eyes. “Okay,” I muttered, my voice only above a whisper. “Fine. Sorry I asked.”
He looked at me again and groaned. “Skye,” he pleaded. “Babe, please don’t-”
I looked away so he wouldn’t see my agonized, pathetic face.
He sighed again. “Fine,” he said through his teeth. “But just promise me something.”
I looked back up at him. “Anything.”
“I want you to remember something too. Remember that I would do anything to make you happy. I would do everything to make you happy.”
I nodded my head. “I promise.” I put my arms around his neck. “Thank you.”
He pulled me closer and kissed my forehead.
“Be honest with me,” murmured. “Do you truly love him? If he’s the one you want, then I won’t get in the way of your happiness. Like I said, I’d do anything. Even if it means letting you go…”
I felt as if my heart shattered into a million little pieces as I looked at him and saw the same pain in his eyes.
“No. I know who I want.” I dug my face into his chest, and he put his arms around me again.
“You’re still going to sing at the wedding, right?” I asked him, worried that he’d changed his mind.
I could hear a smile in his voice as he spoke.
“Of course I am.”

Aaron’s P.O.V.

I ended up at the beach again.
When things were bad, I threw rocks. When things were really bad, I went swimming.
I sat by the shore when I got tired. The sand was hot, and my body burned even more from the already blazing sun, but I didn’t go back into the refreshing water. I stayed there, and hoped that it was possible that I can be burned until I was nothing but ashes, hoped that I can be put out of my misery once and for all.
I grabbed a handful of sand, then slowly let it slip through my fingers. I did the same thing over and over, until I picked up a piece of glass with the sand. I observed the glass, and it reminded me of Elena. Everything was reminding me of Elena. When I closed my eyes, I saw Elena. When I opened them, I saw Elena. I couldn’t get her out of my head. But this piece of glass was different. Glass was easy to break. Glass was sharp. It was very delicate, but it could cut you just as easy as it was to shatter it.
Just like Elena. I shattered her, and she’d cut me without trying.
I didn’t realize I’d clenched my hand with the glass in it into a fist until I saw the dripping blood. I opened my hand and dropped the glass. I just continued to watch the blood drip.
Plop. Plop.

And here's the second bit. =)

Skye’s P.O.V.

“Hey, Aaron, it’s me. Please call me back. It’s about the wedding.”
I shut my phone and hid my face in my hands. He wasn’t going to call back. Not ever. It had already been a whole week. He hadn’t called back, and when I went over to his house, he wasn’t home. And if he was, he obviously didn’t come running to open the door for me.
The phone rang. I picked it up quickly. “Hello?”
“Hey, pumpkin.” It wasn’t Aaron. But I was glad to hear my father on the other end. “Dad! It’s so good to hear your voice!”
“I just wanted to see how you were doing and let you know I’ll be there Monday.”
It was Saturday. I felt tears in my eyes. “That’s great! I’ll be able to spend time with you before the wedding on Wednesday. I can’t wait to see you!” It was quiet for a moment. “I miss you, Daddy.” I hadn’t called my father Daddy since I was six. I felt like a little girl again. I was gonna start crying like one, too.
“I miss you, too, sweetie. I’m afraid I have to go now, though. I’ll call you when I arrive, ‘kay?”
“Alright. Bye.”
“See you soon, hun.”
I sat there frozen on the bed. Everyone was going to be there.
Everyone but Aaron.
The tears in my eyes escaped, and I sobbed into my hands.
“Angel, what’s wrong?” Adam was suddenly by my side, and he hugged my shoulders.
I took a deep breath. “It’s nothing. My dad’s coming on Monday.”
His brows furrowed. “That’s not the reason why you were crying, Elena. I know you.”
I sighed. I couldn’t tell him it was because of Aaron. “I don’t know, Adam. I have been really sensitive lately.”
Now Adam sighed. “I swear, girls are so complicated.”
He started to walk away, but I tugged on his shirt and held on tight to him. “Don’t leave.”
He wrapped his arms around me, the tightest he ever had before.
“Sensitive isn’t the only thing you’ve been lately,” he muttered.
He was right. I was feeling needy. For him. For a lot of things. I wondered why that was.
Despite my emotions, I forced myself to laugh and let him go. “Sorry.”
He shook his head. “Don’t be. Anyway, come downstairs. My mom’s here. She just got out of the hospital after having her baby, and her boyfriend’s taking us out to dinner.”
I felt surprise on my face. “How come you never told me?”
He shrugged his shoulders. “It never came up.”
“Well you could have at least told me about the dinner part. Now I have to get ready!”
He threw his head back and laughed. “I’ll tell them to wait a few minutes.”

The whole night I held the baby. She was so soft and so warm, and already so beautiful. Her name was Macie. Adam’s mother told me that she was so happy that she finally got a girl, and I laughed. “Yeah, you must have been pretty busy with two boys,” I told her.
“Not really. Aaron was no trouble. Adam was the real rebel.”
I smirked. “Why do I not find that surprising?”
“Aren’t you going to eat anything?” Adam mumbled at me.
“Just some shrimp. I’m not all that hungry.”
Since Adam hadn’t mentioned anything about his mother and dinner, I’d already finished a big bag of chips and a pasta salad at home a few hours before.
I took a sip of my soda, then continued to coo at Macie.
As I held her, I felt a warm feeling in the pit of my stomach. I tried to imagine myself with a big round belly, tried to imagine what it could possibly feel like having such a small living thing inside of you, kicking and making your stomach jump out.
It was a wondrous feeling, this warmth. It was stronger than anything I’d ever felt before.

We got home around nine. When I entered our room, it was humid.
“We really need to get an air conditioner,” I told Adam.
“Sorry, beautiful,” he said, taking off his jacket. “An open window’s the best I can do right now.”
I plopped onto the bed and dug my face into my pillow.
“Aren’t you going to change?”
I groaned in a whiny tone, and he laughed. “Fine, suit yourself.”
I kept tossing and turning the whole night. I couldn’t sleep in this heat. My forehead was covered in sweat. In the middle of the night, I began to feel my stomach churning, and I recognized the feeling. I ran to the bathroom and kneeled in front of the toilet.
The smell reeked. I forced myself to sniff it a bit to get it all out and over with.
It took several minutes. I rinsed my mouth with water and brushed my teeth, then looked at myself in the mirror above the sink. My eyes looked weary, tired. I went back to bed.
“You okay?” Adam asked, a worried look on his face.
“I’m fine. It was probably all of the shrimp I ate.”
I was telling myself this more than I was telling him.
A connection was forming in my head, though I didn’t notice until I could almost hear the clicks.
The emotions, the eating, the warm feeling as I held Adam’s new baby sister, the sickness just now.
I didn’t want to think about it, but I knew exactly what was happening to me.

Aaron’s P.O.V.

My phone rang again. I wanted to launch it into the water like the rocks I threw. I hit ignore, and kept walking.
I had rarely been at my apartment the past few days. I was practically living at the beach now. I only went back to sleep. I came to the beach early in the morning, had my breakfast, lunch, and dinner there, and threw rocks in between. There was nothing else to do.
I listened to my voice mail. All of them were from Elena, all of them the same message.
It’s me. I have to talk to you about the wedding. Call me back.
I have to talk to you about the wedding. Please call.
Call me back, I convinced Adam to let you come to the wedding.
I didn’t give a damn about the wedding anymore. It didn’t matter if I could go. I wasn’t going, either way.
The final message began to play, and I stopped myself from pressing the delete key when I heard the urgency in her voice.
Aaron. I need to see you. Please. I don’t know what I’m going to do.
I froze completely. I listened to the message over again. Her voice sounded worried, sounded like she was crying. I dialed her number. She picked up on the first ring.
“Hello?”
I said nothing.
“Hello? Who is this this?”
“Elena?” I muttered softly.
It was quiet on the other end.
“I’m at the beach. I’ll be waiting.”
I began pacing as I waited for her.
I found her sitting by the shore, not even looking around to find me. Wasn’t she the one that was supposed to find me?
I sat down next to her, and waited for her to say something, but she kept looking out into the distance.
“What happened?” If she was this quiet, something serious was going on.
She was silent.
“I went to a clinic today,” she murmured, still not looking at me.
My eyebrows furrowed. “A clinic? Why? What’s wrong, are you okay?”
She finally looked at me, with eyes so drowsy, they looked dead. And then, with one little halfhearted smile, she said, “I’m pregnant.”

I sat there frozen. Why was she telling me this? Was she trying to break me on purpose? Hadn’t she cut me enough already?
Damn it, Elena, I thought. Why me?
“You should go home and tell Adam,” I told her in a low voice. “He should know.”
I walked away.

Only one more part to To Be Loved, then comes Wings. ;D